


Wang chung Or I'll Kick Your Ass

by MrsKissyT



Category: Veronica Mars (TV), Veronica Mars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Fix-It, no love triangles, please fix it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-05-13 10:41:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19249537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsKissyT/pseuds/MrsKissyT
Summary: Team: No LoVe Triangles!Let's just make this one of those not real things...Sorry (not sorry), Leo. Ya never stood a chanceA kill-it-before-it-can-happen/fix it fic.





	Wang chung Or I'll Kick Your Ass

 

Giving Meg one last glance as she let Duncan lead her onto the dance floor, Veronica smiled to herself before heading out of the gym. 

It was bittersweet at best, watching one of the few people who’d remained a steadfast friend for the past year be swept off her feet by the boy Veronica had naively thought was  _ The One  _ for so long. Pursing her lips together to keep her face devoid of emotion as her chest began to constrict, she picked up the pace down the hallway making a beeline for the exit.

It wasn’t that she still had feelings for Duncan—she  _ really _ didn’t. But Veronica still didn’t have closure from their so-called break up, and she’d be lying if she said it didn’t sting to see him moving on, especially with someone that knew them all…before. It almost felt like  _ this _ was truly the end of the ‘Fab Four’, all of them now nowhere near where they’d been a year and a half ago.

She was less than ten feet from her car when she was startled by the loud screech of tires that brought Logan’s ugly yellow banana of a truck into the parking lot, coming to a sudden stop in between two beat up cars in a spot reserved for staff. Cringing as his car door swung open—leaving an unfortunate dent in Mr Wu’s silver sedan—Veronica watched Logan topple out of the X-Terra.

Without pants.

Sighing as she internally let go of the thought of an impromptu pity party, she dashed across the parking lot quickly, cutting Logan off before he reached the double doors.

“Ronnie!” he yelled, grabbing onto her shoulders and crushing her into his chest. He reeked of vodka, a smell Veronica was all too familiar with.

“Logan, hey,  _ hey _ . Come on, buddy. Trust me, you  _ don’t _ want to go in there. Let’s get you back in the car and I’ll drive you home,” she said as she wrapped her arm around his waist, attempting to twist him back the other way.

The normal grace he exuded was severely lacking now as he stumbled along with her, losing his balance when he stepped off the curb and giggling as he knocked into her. Groaning at his weight, she twisted under the arm he’d slung over her shoulder, pressed her hand firmly against his chest and pushed him upright, suddenly grateful for the high heeled booties Meg had chosen for her to wear.

Unfortunately, he must have realized where she was leading him. Before she could react, the weight of his arm was gone, as he pivoted on his heel and headed back toward the school.

“Nope! No can do, Veron-nonica!” he slurred, the inflection of his voice disturbingly reminiscent of Dick. “I’ve got my sunglasses on at night. I’m ready to p-par- _ tay _ like it’s 1999, aaaand I’m not wearing pants!  _ No pants _ , Veronica. Tom Cruise insists.”

Frowning at the celebrity reference—she just could not escape that guy today!—Veronica grabbed for his arm, grasping it with both hands and pulling him back towards her. She was beginning to sense this was going to be a long night.

“I think Tom Cruise will forgive you for missing a high school dance this one time. Give me your keys. Where-where the hell  _ are _ your keys?” Her eyes were wide as she realized the limited number of places they could be on the pantless boy in front of her.

“Relax, Veronica. I’ve got them riiiight here. Hey! No one drives my truck but me!” he laughed, raising his arm and dangling the keys above his head, giggling as she tried to reach them.

“Dammit, Logan!” she groaned while jumping for them “I’m not gonna drive it! Just-just  _ give _ .  _ Me _ .  _ your _ .  _ Keys _ -oof!”

She couldn’t help but laugh at herself—the entire situation, really—as she tumbled into his chest once she’d successfully wrapped her hands around both his arms, pulling them down to her level.

“Why Veronica, if you wanted to be close to me, all you had to do was ask,” he quipped, emphasizing the ‘k’, at the end as he gave her a coy smile.

“What can I say? Those tighty whiteys really do it for me,” she said, struggling to loosen his grip on the keys by lifting each finger off one by one.

“Veronica?”

Startled by the unexpected voice, Veronica turned to see Leo standing by a dark grey VW Jetta, which Veronica assumed to be his personal car. Logan, not quite as alert as usual in his impaired state, turned with her, but in much slower motion

“Leo? What, uh, whatcha doin here?” she asked, tightening her grip on Logan’s arm as she felt him squirm. She gave Leo a once over, noticing his Miami Vice inspired outfit. “By the looks of it, you aren’t here on official business.”

“I got a call...from your friend, the blonde one from earlier. She said you could use some, uh, some company—hey, is he OK?” he asked, his focus landing on Logan, who was attempting to extricate himself from Veronica’s grasp.

“Oh, you mean Meg? Um, well, as you can see, I have my hands full so I uh...thank you for coming. Sorry you had to uh, wear that.”

She gave him an apologetic look, knowing she was potentially blowing off an attempt on his part to really start something with her, but she wasn’t about to leave Logan alone. Especially after the last couple days he’d had, the results of their stake out at the Sunset Regent most likely the root of his antics tonight.

“Hey, who is this guy?” Logan whispered loudly into her ear. It made her shiver in a way she wasn’t expecting,  _ at all,  _ and she could feel her cheeks warming at the sensation—definitely something she’d have to contemplate later.

“This,” she said, turning her attention back to him and grabbing onto the arm he’d now wrapped around her waist in an attempt to steady him, “is the friendly officer of the law—would you stand still, please?!—who is going to overlook your underage drunkenness.”

“Uh, Veronica? Can I talk to you for a minute…?”

Veronica glanced at Leo as he cleared his throat, clearly uncomfortable. She knew she had no right to ask him for  _ another _ favor, but she couldn’t allow anything else to happen to Logan this week. She’d found herself feeling oddly protective of him, something she hadn’t felt in more than a year.

“Uh huh,” she nodded. “I’m just take him to the car first, OK? Just uh...could you wait here, please?”

“I think it’d be better if I came with you,” he said, the tone of his voice sounding more like Deputy D’Amato with every passing moment.

Internally cringing at the possible disaster she had on her hands, she gave him a thin lipped smile.

“OK! My car’s right over here. Come on, Tom. Let’s get your pantless ass home.” She sighed, grateful Logan didn’t fight her this time as she lead them towards the car.

“You know you love my ass,  _ Verrrronica Mars _ .”

“Who doesn’t,” she snarked, opening the passenger door and shifting them until he slumped into the seat. “OK, buckle up. I’m gonna make sure there isn’t an issue here, and then we’ll blow this popcicle stand,  _ capiche _ ?”

“Hey,” he said, his voice suddenly somber, the intensity in his eyes catching Veronica off guard. He took her hand in his and squeezed it tightly. “I can’t...I can’t go home. Trina…”

Understanding immediately where he was going with his thought, she placed her free hand over his and squeezed back.

“My dad is gone until tomorrow night. You can sleep on my couch, OK?” She gave him a small smile and she felt the tension recede as he nodded and lessened his grip on her hand. For reasons she couldn’t quite define, she rested her forehead against his for a beat—something she used to do when he was upset and drunk from Lilly’s latest dumping.

“Thanks, Ronnie...” he whispered, closing his eyes.

The moment was abruptly interrupted by Leo loudly clearing his throat. A bit miffed at his inability to read the situation in front of him—Logan _ clearly _ going through something—she sighed loudly and let go of Logan’s hand, shutting the passenger door behind her, then turning to face Leo.  She took a step towards him, back straight, ready to defend Logan if it came to it.

“He seems pretty drunk to me, Veronica...I don’t know if I can let him go now, knowing he drove here like that…” Leo started, running his palm across his mouth.

She could tell he was conflicted, which actually worked to her advantage. Though she felt a little guilty, once again pouncing on the opportunity to manipulate him, there was  _ no way in hell  _ she was allowing him to take Logan  _ anywhere _ .

“Look, Leo. I really do appreciate you coming all the way down here, and I’m sorry that you’ve wasted your evening. But my...friend, Logan, has had a really craptastic week. His mother...well, you know what happened there. It really hit him hard yesterday, and he’s just trying to deal.’

“Come on, Veronica…” he groaned.

“It would mean so much to me, Leo, if you let this go. Just this once. I swear, I’ll make sure he doesn’t drive again until he’s sober.” She looked up at him with furrowed brows, hoping her eyes conveyed her pleading.

“Look, as much as I’d like to stay in your good graces, I can’t...what if your dad finds out? I just…” His hands on now on his hips, he lowered his head to his chest and began to pace in a circle.

Unimpressed by his lack of empathy, Veronica rolled her eyes and huffed as she walked around the front of the Le Baron to the driver’s side and yanked the door open. It looked like Logan was beginning to fade, and she really didn’t want to try and haul him inside while unconscious.

“Veronica, wait-”

“Do you have someone in your life that you would do anything for,  _ Deputy  _ D’Amato? Someone you care about more than yourself? Who you just want to protect?” Her lip twitched slightly at his flinch in response to her formality. She took his abashed look as a yes.

“Well, that was who Lynn Echolls was to Logan. So  _ maybe _ , just this once, you could cut him some slack.” She waited a beat, eyebrows raised expectantly, until he finally relented, giving her a small nod.

“Thanks, Leo. I owe you one.” At his quirked brow, she cleared her throat before climbing into the driver seat. “Again.”

Shutting the door, she turned to Logan who had shifted to slump against the door,  looking lost. For all the bravado he put forth on a daily basis, Veronica was sure that this was probably closer to his true state these days. As that old pang of fierce protectiveness washing over her again, she decided right then that she would do what she could to help him through this. What he needed now, more than anything, was someone to care about him, and she knew, given their history, she was the only person who could do that.

“All right, Logan. Let’s get you to bed,” she said quietly, giving his leg an affectionate pat.

“Hey, Veronica.”

Hearing a tapping at her window, Veronica turned to find Leo standing there. Internally sighing—she just wanted to get the poor guy home!—she rolled it down and smiled. He  _ was _ letting them go, after all.

“You know, your friend Meg may have called me, but...I came tonight because I wanted to see  _ you _ . Can you at least text me when you get home? I just want…”

“Sure, of course. Thanks again, Leo. I’ll stop by the station next week with pizza,” she said quickly, starting the engine. He nodded again, looking a bit resigned, and she gave him a small wave before putting the car in reverse and pulling out of the spot.

* * *

  
Driving the familiar route home, Veronica wondered if maybe running into Logan had been a small blessing in disguise. Though she’d thought Leo was quite handsome, his continued interruptions and lack of empathy tonight was already grinding on her nerves. Starting anything with him would most likely not have worked. 

As she pulled into the apartment lot, her phone began ringing. Parking the car, she reached into her bag and pulled it out, groaning loudly before answering.

“Hello? Hello! You know, this is really getting old. Stop wasting my minutes!” she griped before dropping her phone into her lap.

“Secret boyfriend trouble?”

Glancing at Logan—she hadn’t realized he was even awake—Veronica rolled her eyes and huffed.

“No, someone keeps crank calling me. This is the fourth time tonight,” she said, shaking her head.

“Star 69 them.”

She frowned at the obvious. “I already have. But every time I do, it just rings and rings.”

“Here, give it to me, I’ll do it.” He held his hand out for the phone, rolling his eyes when she hesitated. “Just let me do it? He wiggled his hand in front of her. “Hey, magic fingers.”

“Seriously did  _ not _ need to know that,” she said, faking a gag before slapping the phone into his palm. “You trying it isn’t gonna make any difference. No one ever picks up—” Her voice trailed off when Logan held his finger to her mouth, phone now at his ear.

“Hey, who’s this? There’s only room for one asshole at this number....What? No, sir. That asshole would be me. Hey man, who is—”

Veronica snatched the phone out of Logan’s hand. “Who _is_ this? Why do you keep calling me!?” she shouted.

“This is a payphone. You must be talkin’ about that blonde lady,” a man’s slurred voice on the other end said.

She felt her stomach drop at that, looking up at Logan, who looked about as confused as she felt anxious.

“Veron—” he began to whisper, before she pressed her hand firmly across his mouth, giving him a hard look and quick shake of her head.

“Blonde lady? A-a payphone where?”

Her emotions were starting to break through, and her voice cracked as the thought of her mother being within reach brought what little hope she still had to the surface.

“Sagebrush Cantina, Barstow.”

Shocked that it was possible her mother was within driving distance, she snapped the phone shut, dropping it on the middle console. Lost in the ramifications of what this could mean, she missed Logan’s attempts to get her attention, until his fingers snapped below her face.

“ _ Veronica _ !  _ What _ is going on?” he demanded.

Shaking her head to clear it, she refocused, her eyes locked on his. She saw the moment he understood what the emotions on her face meant, as Logan’s gaze softened and he looked away, running a hand through his hair.

“Jesus…..” He sighed, straightening up in the seat and turning to fully face her. Considering how he’d been acting less than an hour ago, he seemed surprisingly sober. “Where is she?”

Swallowing the lump in her throat—she was  _ not  _ about to let him see her cry—she matched him in posture, readying herself for the outburst she was sure would happen when she told him he could sleep it off at her apartment alone, but she  _ needed _ to follow this lead. Though admittedly, she did feel pretty guilty about having it come to that.

“She’s at a cantina in Barstow. It’s a really long drive, and I need to leave right now so I don’t miss my chance. Logan, I’m...I’m really sorry to do this to you, but you’re gonna have to either stay here until I get back, or I’ll call someone else to give you a ride to Dick’s...and I  _ really _ don’t wanna do that,” she grimaced.

“Though Dick’s would be better than being stuck here alone, no offence, I’d rather not show up at his place like  _ this _ ,” he glanced down at his bare legs, “so we can forget that.”

Eyes still focused on each other, the silence between them only lasted a beat before Veronica snorted loudly, causing Logan to snicker. It wasn’t long before they were both laughing, breaking the heaviness that had been hovering in the air.

Recovering first, Logan ran both hands through his hair and cleared his throat. Shifting to lean his back against the door he gave her a thin lipped smile before starting again

“Look, I  _ know  _ you’re perfectly capable but being alone, but with the crazy emotions I can  _ see _ you’re going through, it’s not safe, you know?”

“Logan, I  _ don’t  _ need a babysitter,” she scoffed with an eye roll.

“And  _ I’m _ not gonna let you go alone. I’m coming with you _ , OK? _ ” He leveled her with a look that dared her to challenge him. “Look, I’m not even that drunk anymore,” he added, concentrating on his finger as he moved it back and forth in front of his face.

She flopped back against the seat, knowing Logan wasn’t going to budge, and she really wasn’t in the mood to argue.  It may have been his sound reasoning—honestly, he wasn’t wrong—but she knew having him in the car would help her keep her emotions at bay, allowing her to concentrate on what needed to happen if she found her mom.

“Hey, Veronica?” Hearing the sincerity in his voice, she glanced at him. “Please let me do this. After  _ my  _ mom...well, if you can find yours, I’d like to be there to help you. Ya know?”

Focusing on her hands, she smiled and nodded in agreement. If anyone understood her desperation right now, it was Logan.

“If you puke in my car, you are  _ so _ paying for it.”

“Full service detail, even if I don’t.”

She let out a long sigh, resigned that she had no choice but to bring him.

“You’ll have to do everything I say, no matter what. No questions, and no getting in my way…”

“Yes, yes. Veronica Mars is in charge. Ronnie, I get it.” he grumbled.

Satisfied with his compliance, she gave him a single nod, almost forgetting what he was missing until he slightly shifted in the seat.

“Fine, you can come. But for the love of God, we need to get you some pants. I’ll grab something of my dad’s for you.”

“Too distracting?” he quipped, bobbing his eyebrows up and down.

“There’s _distracting_ , and then there’s _this_ ,” she cringed, fluttering her hand at him. “And no one else needs to see you like that.”

* * *

Driving up the 15 to The Middle of Nowhere, CA, Veronica now found herself in a car for the next three-ish hours with Logan Echolls, of all people, as her passenger.

At least now he was wearing pants.

Having been silent for the last half-hour, she snuck a peek at him, chuckling to herself when she found him leaning against the window, mouth agape and softly snoring.  This definitely wasn’t the way she’d pictured her night going. Like,  _ at all _ .

Oddly enough though, she was kind of OK with it.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, thanks to the Beta Goddess herself - Irma66


End file.
